Someone New 

While We’re Doing The Honesty Thing …

Someone New and I a little chat about our “Famous Five”. You know: the five famous people you’d be allowed to cheat on your significant other with, should you ever get the chance to meet them. It’s a silly game, I know, but we played it. I think I mentioned something about watching Angelina Jolie films in bed, naked, for the whole day, because she was one of my Famous Five at the time. He replied: “I’d need to wash the duvet, couch and anything else I came into contact with if you were there and we were watching her in films” and left it at that.

I just kinda assumed he was talking about spunking all over the place, which is an understandable reaction to have in my opinion. A little while later on, however, continuing with the conversation, he said a similar sentence. Something about getting very sticky, messy, and having to wash everything he came into contact with.

“Well, that’s what showers are for. I’ll clean you all off when you’re done.”

“No, I don’t mean when I’m done … ”

I was lost. What did he mean? What was he talking about?? Is he talking about making me squirt? Or something else? Because I’d really wish he’d get to the point. I hate being confused.

“I don’t understand what you mean. Please elaborate.”

“It doesn’t matter.”

And it was forgotten about, once again, until a few hours later. He sent me what looked like a photo as I was getting into bed, so I made myself comfortable, prepared myself, and opened my phone for what I thought was going to be a dick pic. But it wasn’t a dick pic. It was something else. A screenshot. A screenshot talking about having “unnatural amounts of pre-come”.

Okay, like, how much is an unnatural amount? Because I’ve been told I get “unnaturally wet” during sex. Are we talking about the same kinda thing here or… ?

And what does this mean? Is it a problem? And if so, is it a problem all the time? Or just when he’s erect? I’m assuming he’s not just randomly walking around town with it leaking out?

I have so many questions.

HOW DO I HANDLE THIS?!

Not one to flirt around the subject, I decided to have a Google and apparently there are quite a few young lads out there experiencing this. Surely it just adds extra lubricant to make things nice and slippery? I know when a girl is wet it’s considered a good thing, so surely it would be a good thing if he was wet too? I don’t really know what to make of this. Unusually, this is something I haven’t had to deal with before.

I like this part of the relationship where you’re still learning new things about each other. We’ve not slept together yet. In fact, we’ve barely done anything except a few stolen kisses and some childish hand-holding. Oh, and those times he put his hand on the back of my neck, or when he put his hands on my hips when we were bowling. They might only have been the slightest of touches but they sent shivers down my spine. You know what it’s like when you REALLY like someone … everything they seem to do is sexy, right? But we know NOTHING about each other. I don’t know what he looks like naked. He doesn’t know what I look naked. I don’t know what his skin feels like, his tongue tastes like, how he smells as I get close to nuzzle his neck. It’s hot, it’s sexy, it’s anticipation. And there’s always something new!

I’ve had to learn how to work with a small penis, circumcision, an unnaturally massive cock, one bollock… 

With Someone New, we have a penis that bends slightly (apparently) and unnaturally large amounts of pre-come.

Different day, different penis problem. (Well, not a problem, but you know what I mean.)

So yeah, what do I do with this information? I guess I won’t know what to do with it until I see it up close and personal, so to speak. But how much can there really be???

Another complicated chapter in my sex life, it would seem!


Thanks so much for reading my blog today! 🖤

Read all about Someone New, the full chapter, right here

If you’re in the market for something a lil’ spicier, why not check out one of my smutty favourites:

Featured image by geetanjalkhanna on Unsplash

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